Most of us want to strive for a sense of long-lasting happiness. One that feels deep and doesn’t fade easily. We have some intuitive sense of what we perhaps consider better indicators of joy. than others. But how do we know whether we are creating the types of happiness that we want to have in our lives?
Luckily, we don’t have to guess anymore. Research has uncovered the neurotransmitters that form our happiness. And there are many of them.
When I first learned about these, it suddenly changed how I viewed the pursuit of happiness. Most importantly, how we can generate a deep and lasting sense of happiness, something I believe most of us want to obtain. With an improper understanding, I realized I was chasing after quick highs which also meant experiencing lows. Imagine spending a whole life chasing after happiness and running in cycles like these.
By understanding these chemicals, I’ve been able to work to produce the ones I want (and avoiding other ones in unhealthy contexts). I practice working on the ones that can create a more stable sense of happiness that isn’t prone to cycles of highs and lows. It’s allowed me to not so easily crave things. You can imagine it now as a consistent sense of joy that leaves me fulfilled. It’s something I’m thankful I was able to make a conscious part of my lifestyle.
So what are these magical parts of our biochemistry?
The Nuts And Bolts Of Our Brain
There are four primary chemicals our brain produces that we associate with a feeling of happiness: endorphins, dopamine, serotonin, and oxytocin. I love the way Simon Sinek breaks them down in his talk “Leaders Eat Last” which you can see for yourself below. But if you’re looking for a quick summary of just the biochemistry, here’s what you need to know.
- Endorphins: Endorphins are the simplest chemicals of the bunch. They trigger when we are in pain. Weird huh? But this is actually why we enjoy laughing. When we do this, we are actually damaging our diaphragm which then releases endorphins. The same chemical is responsible for what we know as a “runner’s high”. This is essentially a masking chemical for pain.
- Dopamine: This is the one you’ve probably heard the most about and probably assumed was responsible for all of your happiness. It’s a very powerful chemical triggered when we achieve things like winning a trophy or crossing something off our to-do list. It’s served an important biological function in mapping our goals. Without it, we wouldn’t feel as strong of an urge to consume food when we aren’t hungry, which was extremely important during early times. It’s the foundation of what we consider a reward system. Just like you train a pet with treats, dopamine is the training chemical for human activity. It’s quick, responsive, and easily sets us on the needed path. The only downside is that dopamine is highly addictive. And there are numerous activities that offset dopamine release, taking advantage of our biological systems. Alcohol, technology, drugs, and gambling hijack our dopamine reward system disproportionately. With the other fact that dopamine tends to leave as quickly as it came, they can create a cycle of use with little benefit to ourselves.
- Serotonin: Serotonin is the bedrock for hierarchical systems in nature. It’s the chemical released when we gain public recognition or increase our status. The reasonable assumption for the primary emergence of this chemical was to find the best of the gene pool to create new offspring. This was, of course, millions of years ago and now we have a more complex embedding of the chemical. But one important aspect to remember is that serotonin is long-lasting and makes us feel a part of the group. By gaining status, it pushes us to be a mentor and train others as well. This is made clear by the fact that when someone else is publicly recognized for something, say your child or student, you yourself get an intake of serotonin. This is why Simon Sinek also refers to serotonin as the leadership chemical. It’s responsible for creating leaders in our society and us trusting to follow them.
- Oxytocin: If you’ve looked into biochemicals before, this tends to be the other major one. That’s because Oxytocin is the strongest out of the list of the chemicals and the most deeply fulfilling. This is what’s released with feelings we call love, passion, purpose. It’s a chemical designed to experience human connection and act selflessly towards others. It’s also another long-lasting feeling and tends to make us feel very whole in a way that’s hard for us to articulate in language.
Now that we know the inner workings of what we feel collectively as “happiness”, we can also work to generate the important feelings that we want. What does that look like?
Writing the Proper Code
When I learned about these chemicals, I realized what was causing my “happiness problems”. Why my good feelings always felt fleeting. I was constantly chasing after dopamine highs. And I did not have systems to actively pursue serotonin and oxytocin levels of happiness. Ones that don’t just fade easily. It’s not that I was in a horrible state. But I knew I was missing something important.
Learning about the differences in these chemicals allowed me to play to their strengths and work for the type of deep type of joy I wanted.
Biologically what that looks like is having high levels of serotonin and oxytocin. But there’s a reason most people aren’t in that state. It’s difficult. Those chemicals take time to build up. So we often instead chase after dopamine which is a lot easier to obtain. But if we want to have that deeper sense of fulfillment, we have to strive for more human connection.
I remember one of the changes I made out of this was putting my phone away when I was with others. Usually that device sends a surge of dopamine from seeing notifications. Which feels really nice. But in situations where you’re supposed to be building connections, it’s not in the proper place. I realized I was using it to get out of social situations that weren’t rewarding me enough in the moment.
And when I did decide to put the phone away, it allowed me to open up with others and work to build trust and real connections. That was a risk. And sometimes it didn’t work. Sometimes the conversations remained dull and lingered on. But it was worth it for when it did work. Because now I feel closer with the people I interact with frequently. It’s me now feeling a deep bond with others at all times.
Now that may seem like an over-exaggeration. Just putting away your phone doesn’t mean you have the key to lasting happiness. But it’s a small part of what I did to ask myself why I do the things I do. And when I reframed my daily life to push for more of the long-lasting chemicals, overtime I created a deeper sense of happiness. And I was also able to avoid the behaviors that would lead me to unhealthy habits, knowing they could trap me with dopamine releases.
I’d encourage you to think about what it would be like to reframe the way you experience a happy life. Instead of chasing after certain highs endlessly, notice that having a deep and consistent sense of joy comes from pursuing meaningful things and human relationships. When you consciously work for these, you are biohacking your brain to how you want to be happy
